Look Back, Be Proud & Thankful

I hope things are steadily getting checked-off your to-do list! After two separate thesis presentations for music and psychology, two group projects, and cultivating my psychology thesis document from zero to forty-four pages within the past week alone, the end of my semester is ending with a huge sigh of relief. I finally feel pressures dissolving, as I finally get to spend time celebrating success with my close friends and family.

Looking back on this semester, I faced the heaviest work load of my college career, just barely dipping my toes into post-graduate plans. I initially thought I would be bogged down by comparing myself to others. Through academic and personal challenges, I have began to fully realize what is important to me in the present and how to preserve that in the long term.

This semester has certainly stole the best of me at times, compromising basic physical and emotional health, but my support system has never been stronger or more salient. I never fully realized or appreciated the support I have from friends and family. With their help, I have found my strengths in my sound mind. I learned to set boundaries for myself. I learned that saying no to extra work or responsibilities is sometimes necessary, that asking for help and guidance is a sign of self-awareness and true growth, not weakness. I learned that perspective I take on my work and activities is far more important than the final output.

Sometimes, I had allowed confusion and self-doubt to seep in through pressured expectations of stress. I was not focusing what I could do, but what I had to do, what I was expected to do. I cycled thoughts of self-pity in my mind, limiting my own abilities and experiences by letting circumstance decide prevent me from trying in the first place. I began asking myself, “What type of person am I? What type of person do I want to be?” These questions have helped me stay on track and actively approach daily goals, from anything as small as maintaining day-to-day conversations with my significant other or making the time to journal by myself on Jaqua Quad.

This first, formidable semester of senior year has pushed me to new limits. It has been an incredibly busy time for producing works (thesis) and catapulting me into post-undergraduate thinking (I over heard someone a few weeks ago say, “Senior year, it’s over before it even begins.”) These transitional times always seem daunting from a far, like we might not rise up to the occasion, but that is all part of the process. More often than not, we look back, and are proud and thankful.

When chapters of our lives close, positives and negatives emerge; the dangerous longings of what-ifs, the idealist appeals without sustained action. However, at these turning points, it is important for us to recognize ourselves and how we have changed throughout a process.

Most importantly, when you read this, I hope I am somewhere celebrating the end of the semester like this…

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