I don’t know anyone here and of course the only person I recognize and would talk to right away so I don’t look like a fish out of water knows a lot of people and is really good at this small talk thing. I can’t hang around them the whole time. What do I do with my hands? This glass is is making my hands clammy — oh I have to hold it in my left hand because if I hold it in my right hand it’ll make my right hand cold and if I shake anyone else’s hand I’ll be that girl with the literally cold handshake. Ok… Just stay cool, Franny, you got this.
Oh yes, I’ve been there, the internal monologue associated with networking and talking to strangers in a professional capacity. Between caring about your first impression, talking about yourself with confidence and not arrogance, stating admiration for a company, person, or job without seeming desperate, and all the while taming nerves — I definitely envy people who are naturally as cool as a cucumber when it comes to these type of interactions. I’ve gotten better at them by preparing beforehand and also realizing that 98% of people are not judging me as much as I might think they are (I also had no job when I really revved up my networking and informational interviews, so that flamed up and burned the negative, slimy feelings I had about it out of necessity!). Whether it’s an informational interview, job interview, or networking during an event, here are some tips in preparing to help you stay quick on your toes and put your best-self forward!
1) Do your research. Be prepared to ask meaningful questions, but also be prepared to talk about your experiences and future goals.
Depending on the situation, the amount of research will vary and how you will talk about yourself will differ. If you’re at an event where there are people you do want to connect with, focus on those individuals and not the whole room (especially if you’re more introverted like me). If you don’t know anyone at the event, or know about who is sponsoring it/how it’s sponsored, try to go with a friend or talk to some of the organizers about the group.
While the research about a company, person, and position are very important and should not be skipped, there is equal importance in preparing to talk about yourself. Job interviewers and employers are trying to get to know you, professionally and personally! In an informational interview I had 2 years ago, I was caught off-guard when the interviewee asked me a lot of professional development questions about myself, to which I responded with awkward silences and “oh…um… well.” It was a really staggering moment for myself and that’s when I more deliberately started thinking about executing my passions, efforts, and goals.
2) Show your personality by finding a personal connection.
It is definitely easier to do this if the other person mentions a similar hobby or activity first. But after your research, you’ll have more material than you think. Even if you don’t find anything explicit (No way, you like learning random facts about state license plates, too?!), take note of the circumstance. For instance, asking “What brings you here today?” would work at a networking event and “How do you feel your previous roles have brought you to your current one” would be better for an informational or job interview. I’ve left interviews feeling they didn’t go as well as they could have, not only because I knew my nerves got the better of me, but also because I felt like I didn’t get to show them my personality. When preparing for an informational or job interview, think of a few things that you want the person to know about you before the conversation ends. This tip helps naturally integrating all of your awesome accomplishments into the conversation and is a great starting point for appropriately mentioning other hobbies.When your non-work related hobbies and activities outside do not come up, just remember you can set the tone! The way we hold ourselves says a lot about our personalities, it’s just a matter of being comfortable with yourself and that beaming into confidence.
3) Always say thank you, “pay it forward” when you can, and follow up.
For informational and job interviews, I always make sure to express thank you at 3 different times: once at the beginning of the conversation, at the end, and in an email the next day. After networking events, seminars, or meeting a fellow employee (who works at a different location), I always make sure to send a quick email to whoever I met and had a substantial connection with (don’t forget connecting on LinkedIn, too!) Writing thank you notes, have always been something I enjoy. But in the age of technology and quick turnaround times, stick to email and save your hand written stationery for special occasions.
Even at the beginning of your career, recognize opportunities in which you can give back– whether its getting involved with your company’s internship program, returning back to your college to recruit, hosting current students or recent graduates at your company (much like many of CP&R’s treks), being an alumni interviewer, or sharing job posts with friends and peers who have talked about going into something like that opportunity. I would not have been able to learn as much from Scripps alumnae and other connections if it had not been for sharing their very valuable time and resources!
Finally, follow up. After you’ve gotten your next big gig, tell the people who helped you on that journey! A quick email updating them and thanking them for the advice and information they gave you is great. Following up isn’t exclusive to professional contacts, remember to call up your family, friends, email professors, and the staff at CP&R where you are now!
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Next week, I will be writing about finding workplace culture fit and personal working styles. See you then, Readers!