NiceGirl’s Page: American Men Need To Get A Reality Check

When you type in “The Nice Guy” on Google, you probably don’t expect to find a page where a man decided to rant about his problems with American women—oops, I’m sorry, I mean “Ameriskanks” as he likes to call us. I guess since he had the decency to make sure the “A” was still capitalized I should be grateful…But since I’m an American woman, of course I would be complaining.

At first glance, this web site can get your blood boiling to an intolerable level. But once you simmer down and see where the self-proclaimed “Nice Guy” is coming from, his overall points are just laughable. Allow me to share the joke with you, dear reader.

A self-proclaimed “nice guy” is saying that Western women are evil because the women “pick new privileges for [themselves], while keep[ing] all the old privileges [they] already have.’” I’m sorry, but which America do you live in, Mr. Nice Guy—in fact, which world do you live in —in which women have so many privileges that they can pick new ones? Last time I checked, men have always been the privileged ones in our society. Male privileges that I can actually list: higher pay, the ability to be in the workforce without being seen as a bad parent, greater odds of not being raped, the ability to have sex with a multitude of partners and not be labeled something negative or derogatory.

Which brings me back to the lovely name this “nice guy” gives us, “Ameriskanks.” Since the “nice guy” loves using dictionary definitions to solidify his points, I would also like to use the dictionary to define what a skank is.

The Oxford English Dictionary defines a skank as “a person (esp. a woman) regarded as unattractive, sleazy, sexually promiscuous, or immoral”. Hmmm… so, my question to him and all the other “nice guys” would be just how exactly all American women can be “skanky” when this “nice guy” has even claimed that “NiceGuy could NEVER get the girl”. Since skanks tend to be sexually promiscuous, they’re supposed to sleep with all of the guys, right? Maybe they smelled the little misogynist lurking in him.

Now I totally, 100-percent agree with the “nice guy” that, “Misogynists aren’t born- they’re made.” Although he starts out by pointing his hate toward Western women, his points and arguments are, in fact, directed toward all women. (FYI: the Oxford English Dictionary defines a misogynist as a person who hates, dislikes, or is prejudiced against women, not just American women. So his choosing to self-identify as a misogynist might be something that the “nice guy’s” wife should know about.)

Now if I understand the “nice guy” correctly, he is also saying that Western women are evil because we act to our benefit? Um, hello—who doesn’t? Human beings are hedonistic creatures, meaning that we love to seek pleasure and go to great lengths to avoid pain. This is probably why the “nice guy” does not want to admit the fact that America and most parts of the world are patriarchal societies. I mean, why would he want to bring that up, even though he’s exploiting his male privilege with a misogynistic website? That would just take all the pleasure away.

Next he says “It’s simple: Women define the concept of sexism strictly from their point of view.” Indeed, it is simple. What other point of view would a woman have? While as human beings we have the ability to empathize with one another, we still cannot completely, 100-percent, see another person’s point of view. This is probably why men and other hegemonic forces in our society have a hard time recognizing their privilege or identifying the impediments that others face.

Now I don’t want the “nice guy” to think that I don’t understand where men are coming from. Men have it hard. The ambiguity around masculinity and yet the strict and confining gender roles that men must assume in order to be considered a “real man” is indeed quite ridiculous. That being said, the “nice guy” also needs to understand that American women are raised with those same notions of masculinity. So when they go around shouting, “where are all the real men at,” that is because they too were raised to see men in a certain way.

I’m truly sorry that the “nice guy” seems to have had many unpleasant experiences with American women, but if he listened to what he was really saying, the problem is not American women. In fact, the problem is the American culture that has produced these women as well as him. I also agree that everyone should have the ability to speak their mind, male or female, so I am not bothered by the existence of his website. A lot of my issues with the “nice guy”, however, stem from the fact that at one point he deemed himself a nice guy that American women killed off. I actually do not even understand how he is married to a woman since he is no longer the “nice guy” he used to be.

No one is nice to everyone all the time.  I’ve been a “nice girl,” myself…And despite the fact that men in general have done some really crappy things to me, it has not made me any less inclined to date one, but rather to continue to learn why they make the choices they make.

We are all products of the environment that we live in, and even though the “nice guy” thinks that he has escaped all of his problems by marrying a Japanese woman and moving to Japan (not surprising considering it is a country that is characterized by its strong sense of patriarchy), I’m sure that if he told his wife that he married her because she would not speak her mind, not promote equality for women, and not seek pleasure for her own benefit, then she would have a lot to say about that. Till then, I will just wait eagerly for his “Why Japanese Women Suck” page.