No matter who you are, at some point in your life, you’ve had to wait for something. Whether it’s waiting in line for the newest video game, or even just in line at the dining hall, mindless waiting is daunting: A minute can feel like a thousand years.
That’s very much how I’ve felt since I applied to some internships less than a week ago. I can’t help but check my email every half-hour, making sure I haven’t missed that crucial message announcing where I might be spending my summer. Alas, nothing has come through — how could I expect to know within four days?
It’s in my nature to be anxious. I come from a family of intensely organized workers; it’s in my blood to obsess over the slightest mistake, and jump to the worst possible conclusions. Needless to say, I can get a bit grumpy studying for tests or waiting for an answer to the unknown.
Ever heard the phrase, Don’t be stressed? Have you ever studied for a midterm, or been writing an essay, when someone tells you not to worry, to be chill? Though they mean well, this piece of advice from friends can sometimes backfire: For me, telling me to not freak out reminds me of the magnitude of the situation. If I wasn’t already stressed, I now have incentive to believe I should be.
During the job-searching process, you’re going to get that a lot: People will tell you not to lose your cool. But then again, what’s wrong with worrying about results from important opportunities, and feeling nervous and emotional? Don’t these emotions reflect how much we care about our futures?
The answer is yes. It’s great to be passionate about a job, project, or results from a test. It’s natural to be curious and want answers to these important parts of life, so we can prepare for the next chapters in our journeys. And it’s understandable to worry about the things we cannot control!
But it’s also important not to let these potential opportunities overtake our lives. We can’t put our work and relationships on hold while we wait for these results. Instead of wallowing in the stress during this process, we’ve should find ways to channel our angst productively.
When I was in high school, I applied for a fellowship in November of my senior year. I had done a creative writing program at Kenyon College that past summer, and thought that receiving the fellowship would validate my experience. I was so intent on getting the award that it blinded my other ambitions. I still did my school work and continued practicing my singing and writing, but getting that award became my obsession.
And when I didn’t get the fellowship, I not only felt extremely devastated and emotionally distraught; I also realized how much time I had wasted obsessing over a meaningless trophy. Before I applied for the fellowship, I’d had fond memories of the writing program. Why couldn’t my experiences alone be enough validation?
After that moment, I vowed to never again become so intensely preoccupied waiting for an accolade or job. Part of the waiting game is realizing that the position itself isn’t everything.
No matter what, the world will keep spinning.
Life works itself out in the most mysterious ways. So keep living in the present, and doing what you like to do. Not only will it make this time pass more quickly, but it’ll also make you a happier human.