Getting Where I’m Going

For my job this summer, I’m going to have to commute in to New York City with my dad at five am every morning. I’m dreading it, but anticipating this daily journey had made me think about the ways in which my parents have helped me to be who I am today. I’ve always felt like I was a fairly self-sufficient, self-motivated person, but growing up, my parents placed an emphasis on me getting great grades and trying everything. They have always supported me in whatever I’ve done, whether it be Girl Scouts or Soccer or Volunteer Work, so long as I was happy. For me, being happy means working hard, and being the best possible version of myself that I can possibly be. That’s kind of just who I am as a person. So while they would have supported me had I just gone to a mid-rate college, or not taken challenging classes in high school, it was myself who worked constantly to get into a school as good as Scripps.

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Talking with my friends, it’s interesting to see how different our parental experiences are, especially in terms of entering the professional world. Some have the benefit of being able to work at their family’s companies to gain experience, or have family friends that have offered them jobs. With both my parents being finance majors, I probably could get some professional experience through their connections, although not doing anything that I would particularly enjoy. One of my other friends even has her parents questioning her about grad school in her freshman year, as they believe a law degree will increase her chances of getting a job with her undergraduate degree being in Philosophy. I can’t even imagine my parents doing this– if anything, it was me that was panicking about the usefulness of my degree in English in the modern-day workforce. Sometimes I worry about my parent’s optimism. Though they both came from humble beginnings, the status of the job market was very different in 1993 (when they graduated college) than it is today. When applying to colleges, they told me to put Stanford as my reach school; in reality, it was Scripps that was my reach.

When I told my dad that my job was going to be teaching this summer, he asked if I wanted to be a teacher. I would love to be an English teacher, or even better, an English professor, but I’ve had several people tell me not to be- one of them being my favorite English teacher in high school. Knowing that only 4% of people who get a Master’s Degree in the humanities end up getting a job in their field, I think I would be a lot better off pursuing one of the many other things that I’m interested in as a career. Still, there’s something to be said for people who will support you no matter what. Even if I feel like that support can be a little blind at times, it’s when I doubt myself that I need it the most.

 

Rookie Mistakes

It’s Monday morning, my first day of interning in DC. I dress in my best business suit outfit and take a look in the mirror. I align my long pencil skirt, straighten my shoulder-padded jacket and smooth my hair. I feel much too overdressed, despite my mom’s frequent assurances that this will make “an excellent first impression on the first day!”

As I walk to the train station, I become instantly aware of how much slower I walk in high heels, probably covering half as much ground as usual. I hope this doesn’t make me late—it’s a half-mile walk to the metro, and after I take the train, another half-mile walk to work after that. I curse myself for not bringing my Birkenstock sandals for the commute. As I wattle at my painstakingly slow rate, the sun beats down stronger and stronger every minute, and it is not long before I am coated in a layer of sweat.

After my first attempt at navigating the DC metro during rush hour—have you ever seen a train packed so full with people that literally not one more ounce of flesh could fit inside? I have—I finally find myself around the corner from the office building. I scout out a bench to sit down, and then pull out my shoulder-padded jacket from my bag and begin to dab beads of sweat from my face and neck, attempting to look somewhat put together. My God it’s hot. I can feel the skin on my feet being rubbed raw from my high heels, as blisters begin to form. It takes nearly everything within my power to force myself to stand up again. I am hot, sweaty, exhausted, my feet are screaming in pain, and I still haven’t even made it to work yet. I feel like Cheryl Strayed (the author and main character of “Wild,” a book that was recently made into a film starring Reese Witherspoon), who hiked the Pacific Crest Trail alone. In the novel, Cheryl frequently talks about how grueling and difficult the journey is–how treacherous and demanding for one’s body. Cheryl hiking the entire West coast is 100% the same thing as me commuting to this internship.

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Reese, as Cheryl, enduring pain on the hike. But look how strong she is being! Read: Look how strong I am being!

Oh, Cheryl. I feel your pain.


Once I have located the office I will be working at for the next 14 weeks, my anxiety begins to subside as I am greeted by another new intern, who has also clearly just found this address for the first time. The anxiety immediately reemerges when we meet our boss, *Mark, the executive director.

From the get-go, it becomes very clear that Mark is an incredibly energetic and enthusiastic man. From one thought to another, Mark’s brain seems to always be moving and turning with productive ideas about how he can better the organization and further its mission. That’s probably what makes him such a brilliant executive director–excitement in one’s work is one of the most important qualities in the nonprofit sector.

Mark announces that he is taking the other intern, *Neel, and I out for coffee in order to give us some background info about the organization. My two thoughts are: This will be interesting! And: Back outside? I just escaped from there! On the walk over, Mark begins his explanation, and I strain to listen as I hobble behind him, trying to keep up in my more-than-uncomfortable, I-hate-these-so-much heels. Seriously, how is this guy walking so fast? 

“Some” info transforms into about 3 hours worth of info at the coffee shop, which is difficult to keep track of in one setting. I try to continuously balance paying attention and mental note taking with maintaing eye contact to demonstrating that I am listening, but it’s challenging. Mark tells us about the organization’s mission, which is to promote education, peace and democracy in Iraq through advocacy work and grassroots projects. There is so much to know about this organization and its work in the Middle East, I feel like I could do a month’s worth of reading and still not understand the complex histories of either. Mark is so knowledgable himself, that even though some of my questions are understandable, I feel inferior for asking them. One thing is clear to me: I need to do more research on my own free time to make sure I feel as caught up to speed as I can be.

All of a sudden,  Neel gets up to use the restroom, so I try to keep the ball of conversation rolling by asking a question.

“So how long have you been working here?”

His answer: “I’m the founder.”

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YIKES. I should have known this. I DID know this, I saw it when I was doing my initial research– how could I have let it slip my mind!? I want to pound my head into the table, but instead I just apologize profusely and then play with the straw in my iced coffee. Why isn’t that intern back yet? What’s taking him so long? How in the world do I bounce back from this? What was that about being up to speed?

Despite that initial embarrassment, the rest of the day goes much more smoothly. It is spent getting acquainted with the office, delegating tasks to Neel and I, and reading some introductory essays. Although it has only been the first day, and although I know I have my work cut out for me, I feel like I am going to fit in well here. I love the small community, the fact that I will be doing real work here (and not just faxing papers), and I believe in what my efforts will be going towards (benefitting displaced people in Iraq). And what an amazing opportunity to spend the day with the founder of the organization I’m interning with–not many people are able to foster those types of relationships, and for that I am grateful.

I am so excited to begin the rest of my summer here– once I master this commute.


Things I Learned on My First Day:

1. Never commute in high heels!!!!!!

2. Research your boss and definitely know if they founded the organization you’re working at.

3. Never commute in high heels.


 

*Name has been changed.