Tag Archives: teaching

“What have I done?”

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I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought this in the last six months.

Is this the only path?

The first was when I learned I had been awarded the Fulbright. A moment that I expected would have been joyous, was actually a mix of relief (that the wait was over) and terror. At a time where most of my peers were still figuring out their post-grad plans, I now had the next year laid out in front me. On March 26, 2012, I was in the same, confused boat as everyone else, and at Scripps that boat is more like a luxurious cruise ship of confusion. By March 27, 2012, I was in a boat of my own. Sure, my dinghy-for-one had a heading, but I really missed the company.

It can be difficult to talk about job opportunities with friends senior year, particularly if they haven’t been offered anything, and even more so if you’ve been offered an opportunity for which they’ve been rejected. Still, I had thoughts and questions to wrestle with, starting with “what have I done?”

I don’t plan on being a teacher. I’m not even sure that I enjoy kids. Actually, I’m fairly certain I don’t enjoy most kids, but you can’t say that sort of thing without sounding heartless. Did I really want to be an English Teaching Assistant? Maybe I got caught up in the Scripps Fulbright frenzy. Maybe I just needed to “win” something to prove my worth. I’d experienced so many lonely moments in Denmark, did I really want to go abroad for a full year? And what about my long-term boyfriend, who I would be leaving behind? I re-read my Statement of Grant Purpose and Personal Statement, regained my confidence and accepted the offer, but these doubts and anxieties did not disappear.

Taking a Fulbright felt very much like walking into the woods without using the buddy system…

They resurged with a vengeance at the airport. I was a crying, snot-faced mess at the gate of my plane, and seriously considered not boarding and wiring Fulbright their money back. “What have I done?” In addition to the doubts about my professional capabilities and trajectory, I was overwhelmed with leaving my boyfriend. After four years of taking those Scripps psychology surveys that ask you context-less questions pitting careers and relationships against each other, I was living out that dilemma. And it hurt.

Now that I’m here, I’m still not sure what I’ve done. I don’t know how to teach. I don’t speak the language. I could be eating my favorite pumpkin bagel with pumpkin cheesecake cream cheese back in the beautifully autumnal Pacific Northwest right now. I could be furnishing an apartment that I plan to live in for more than nine months, or going to my friends’ engagement parties. I could be living somewhere with a Taco Bell right now, for goodness sake!

…but a walk in the woods has its rewards!

But I’m not. I’m on an adventure that requires me to take one step at a time. It’s one that I am ready for, whether I think so or not, and sometimes I need to take time out to remind myself of my strengths. I’m a “Strong Scripps Woman.” I’m good at mentoring, public speaking, recognizing and navigating cultural differences. I work well with a team. I have a good sense of direction.

And sometimes, I can write.

Fulbright Part 2: Working on the Application

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There’s a reason this post is not titled “How to Write the Perfect Fulbright Application.” I cannot tell you the secrets of THE perfect Fulbright app, because a successful application, I suspect, is less about being the Best. Applicant. Ever and more about making a convincing argument that you and your country of choice would make a productive partnership. Here are some ideas for how to craft your own best application.

• Spend time picking the right country for you. You can read about my country-choosing process here, or Adelina Solis ’11 perspective in this post.

We all came for different reasons… but no one came because they were already fluent in Bulgarian. Half our ETA cohort and our language teacher, Diana, in Beginning Bulgarian Language. Fulbright International Summer Institute, 2012.

• Don’t be afraid to take questions to the Fulbright Program Adviser or other staff on-campus. They are busy people, so respect their time and make sure your question hasn’t already been answered on the Fulbright or Scripps websites.

• The Off-Campus Study office keeps binders full of successful Fulbright applications. Do spend time reading them. I went back a couple of times. I found it helpful to take notes and write down ideas I had as I was reading. Take notice of what people list under publications, awards, abstract, and future career goals. No one will tell you how exactly to write these sections, but you may find ideas for what to include and how.

• If you’ve been abroad before, or have previous teaching experience, think about the moments that have stuck with you. Because Fulbright’s mission is to foster mutual understanding, moments that focus on cultural or interpersonal exchange may provide good anecdotal fodder for personal statements.

• If you have a side project, craft it to be mutually beneficial for your country and yourself. If I stayed inside writing science fiction all day, I wouldn’t be interacting much with the culture. With a travel writing focus, I practice my writing, interact with the country, and hopefully help others interact with Bulgaria as well. Other ETAs here plan to volunteer at orphanages, teach music to Roma kids, and practice cartography in their placement cities; use something you’re passionate about.

Cultural exchange can be as simple as teaching Bulgarians the “Wobble.” Fulbright International Summer Institute, 2012.

• Finish at least one draft of your personal statements and grant purpose in time to have the Writing Center take a look. Taking criticism can be hard, for these personal essays even more so than with academic essays (I cried, and I doubt I was the first to do so). The Writing Center staff is there to offer support and constructive feedback. Their ideas can lead to fruitful revision, but it means being vulnerable and open to suggestion.

• Be honest in your application essays. I mention it, because it’s important that you know your essays may be used not only to decide whether or not to award you the Fulbright, but may also determine (in the case of ETAs) where in the country you’ll be placed. It might be a matter of where your side-project (if you have one) will best be completed, or where your hobbies might be accomplished. My own essays mentioned Bulgaria’s natural beauty and my semester learning Balkan Dance. My placement is in Bulgaria’s most beautiful mountain range, and my predecessor took Bulgarian Dance classes at the community center. Coincidence? Nope.

• Make sure you can articulate to yourself WHY you want to do this, WHAT you’ll get out of it, HOW you’ll approach various aspects of the grant (language learning, culture shock, teaching), and ANY reservations you have. Figure out how to address these questions before talking to faculty recommenders, and certainly before your interview. If you’re confident in yourself, they will be confident in you too.

• If you need a neurotic online community, check out the Fulbright thread on the Grad Café forums. I appreciated knowing that the anxiety was not mine alone.

These are my tips for navigating the Fulbright application process. I’ll admit they are biased towards the ETA application, where I have experience. What suggestions would you add to this list?

Fulbright Part 1: How I Chose Bulgaria

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It’s hard to believe that it was exactly one year ago that I was starting my last year at Scripps and frantically preparing my Fulbright application. It’s even harder to believe that the “Dancing of the Balkans” class I took junior year to fulfill my fine arts requirement is about to become a practical life skill here in Bulgaria. Some of you may be considering a Fulbright application yourself. Here’s how I chose this little-known Balkan country for my English Teaching Assistantship (ETA) application.

Credit: Google Maps

But first I am obligated to tell you that my ideas and opinions are my own and do not represent the Fulbright Program, the U.S. Department of State or any affiliated agencies.

It actually took me two years to settle on a particular country, because I’m a neurotic planner (an INFJ, heavy on the J, in Myers-Briggs terms). There are over 60 countries with ETA programs. I started with an open-mind, and narrowed down my list from there. I started by crossing out those countries for which I was ineligible, or much less preferred (e.g. those countries requiring language proficiency, prior teaching experience, or strongly preferring masters students). I took 3 years of French in high school, 2 years of Italian in college, but I didn’t actually speak either language, so I nixed countries where my level of language ability would be a detriment to my application.

Next, I followed the advice of then Associate Dean of Faculty Thierry Boucquey and focused on countries that had ~30% acceptance rate or better. Statistics regarding the number of grants available and the number of applicants from the previous year are available on the Fulbright website (here). Applying to Bulgaria, a country that has historically drawn fewer ETA applicants than its fellow EU nations, allowed my application to stand out. I also noticed during my research phase that the size of the Bulgaria program was growing; Bulgaria only offered 2 ETA placements in 2008, and offers 25 for the upcoming year. You can see how many ETAs a country has hosted over the years by browsing the Fulbright grantee directory.

By this time, my list was a manageable size and spanned Central and Eastern Europe, Central and Southeast Asia. Then I began thinking about my own preferences. A classroom full of 7-year-olds is my worst nightmare, so I narrowed it down to programs teaching high school and above. I don’t function well in hot weather, so I researched the climates of my remaining countries and crossed out the hottest and most humid of the lot. From what I had left, the Balkans interested me the most, but I knew I had no “demonstrated interest” in the region.

At this point, two years ago, I searched the word “Balkan” in the 5-C class schedule and came up with two possibilities. “Dancing in the Balkans” with Pomona Professor Anthony Shay later inspired my European Studies minor. I took a class in Comparative European Politics. I read the blogs of previous ETA grantees. I read articles about Balkan countries on travel sites, like the Matador Network. I researched the unique Fulbright summer institute opportunity for ETAs to Bulgaria. Everything I read appealed to me more and more.

Pravets, Bulgaria, the site of the 2012 Fulbright International Summer Institute and ETA training.

Now, Fulbright in hand, I’m heading to a town in the mountains where folk dance is still a popular form of entertainment. I’m learning a language that will, most likely, be of little utility in my future endeavors, but hey—I never thought I’d dance the horo again either.

Did you have a different strategy or alternative criteria for choosing a Fulbright destination? Share your process in the comments below!

No Longer Wanting to be a Journalist?

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I have always wanted to be a writer, and ideally within the realm of creative writing. However, being realistic, I have also recognized for a long time that one cannot simply graduate from college and become a full-time novelist—at least not if one wants to actually be able to pay rent and eat. This in mind, being a novelist has always been my “slightly unrealistic” career choice that I am determined to pursue, but is also secondary to something slightly more… likely to have a salary.

But what was this “real” career going to be? As much as I want to be a writer, with my busy life I find it hard to sit down and write consistently without solid motivation. Asking myself what best motivates me, and figuring that out to be a looming deadline and the idea of being accountable to others, I put two and two together and settled on magazine or newspaper journalism. For the past two or three years, when asked what I wanted to do after school, I would answer, “Well, I want to be a writer but I’ll probably go into journalism.” It sounded perfect to me, since I would still get writing published frequently, would write because I would have deadlines and topics assigned to me, and could explore other interests such as popular culture and current events.

The past couple of months, however, I’ve started to question this “perfect” career path more and more. Being a journalist still appeals to me; it’s easy to imagine the places I could possibly go and the people I could meet. It sounds like a job that would lead me to be much more engaged with the world more than, say… being a writer, sitting alone in a room with a laptop. And being engaged, through having a variety of experiences, meeting new people, and making a difference, is very important to me.

At the same time, I’ve started to realize that image of the Journalist is less that of a supreme writer—though this is important—and more that of a Researcher, researching the latest scoop and following a story through to its end. The journalist is out there to relay the “truth” or, at least, their opinion, to the public—not just to write. As my passion for literature continues to develop, I’m starting to wonder which I would like more—being a journalist and involved with the world? Or concentrating on something literary, my true passion? (Of course, the ideal job for me is a combination of these two: book critic.)

It is because of this re-thinking that I have recently turned to publishing as another plausible career path. Although it is a business that does not necessarily involve writing, I would be constantly emerged in the world of literature and books. This is not to say I would never try journalism; I’m still very young and am open to a variety of possible careers and internships. I have also started to consider continuing studies and eventually becoming an English professor, which is a profession I used to always believe I would not like. I’m not sure if I would be a good teacher or not, but the idea of being so knowledgeable about a field and then sharing my passion with others appeals to me. It’s too early to truly decide what I want to do, especially since it is now apparent that my ideas are changing constantly.

Of course, no matter what I ended up doing, I will always work on my creative writing on the side.