A few weeks ago, the senior class had their 100 Days party, 100 days until graduation. I told my parents about the event over the phone and their response was that they were going to have their own countdown at home. A few days afterwards, I got a single text from my mom which was a photo of a magnet notepad on our fridge that read “96 Days.”

This week, that countdown is in the 80’s, and overall, I’ve been oddly calm. At 100 Days, I felt neutral. I was enjoying spending time with my close friends and seeing my peers having a good time together. My time in Claremont and as a Scripps student has seen the best and worst of me. As the countdown continues, I am living everyday present now and preparing for the future.

Everyday, there are responsibilities I need to meet; multiple class readings, practicing viola, practicing piano, and working out. Since the beginning of the calendar year, applying for jobs has been added to that list. But admittedly, it is sometimes difficult for me to juggle a deadline the following day for a reading response versus an open-ended job posting. Graduation is only about two and a half months away. Securing a job seems abstract, but it would definitely be ideal for me if that happened much sooner than later. I am just two and a half months away from the bubble of college, a new chapter of life, starting to establish my career, and meeting a lot of new people.

What lay two and a half months away, is extremely exciting. I have a lot planned, to move to the east coast, start my career, finally be in the same city with my boyfriend after being in a long distance relationship. But before that, there is even more planned, dozens more cover letters, orchestra concerts, midterms, a Vegas trip, spring break camping, projects, my senior recital, senior week in San Diego, and of course, graduation. What exactly is present now in my everyday? What do I need to do in the present to prepare for the future?

Everyday, those responsibilities to fulfill are steps towards what I have planned. Everything accomplished everyday will accumulate. It’s like my psychology thesis last fall. By the end of it, writing the 47 pages seemed to have gone by in a flash, but that was only through a daily grind of researching, writing,  and editing. By the end of this semester, securing a job, finding an apartment, graduating, will all go by in a flash, but only through those dozens of cover letters, follow-up phone calls, interviews, and rejections.

Seniors, let’s finish our semester’s off strong, let’s show thesis who’s boss, knock out those steps for what ever post-graduation plans you’re pursuing. We are present now, basking in the southern California sun at the field house pool, catching up with friends at Wednesday tea, doing homework in Seal Court, at the Motley, on Jaqua Quad. We are present now, we are preparing for our futures, advocating for ourselves, making our worth and experiences known, taking steps for self-care and self-love as the days continue to here begins new life.

Hello, readers! I hope this February-summertime-weather is keeping you motivated as the semester progresses!

As the month continues, I have been making great strides in my job process. I have been preparing for interviews, reaching out to Scripps alumnae, and setting up informational interviews. About a month and a half ago, starting the job application process was incredibly daunting for me. I was only sending about one cover letter a week, looking up postings and being picky about them. But I realized, why limit myself? Why am I not asking more of myself throughout this process? After realizing this, I started asking for help and really utilizing the resources around me. By now, the overwhelming majority of jobs I have applied for, I did not even find the original posting. By now, I can crank out 3-4 tailored cover letters in a week or less, research LinkedIn and Life Connections for alumna to talk to about the companies I applied to, and schedule at least one meeting with CP&R to go over it all.

Originally, I was not asking enough of myself. I had to cast the net, look wide and far, and close to home, calling upon all my resources. Until this process, I did not necessarily see myself as someone who could network successfully. But, I thought, why not ask? Why not email an alumna and ask if they had the time to share their experiences with me? Why not apply to a job and then ask a recruiter more about the application process? I thought to myself, you have to ask, Franny, because no one else is going to ask for you. Even though other people sent me postings, proofread my cover letters, it came down to me applying. It came down to me going the extra step to find possible connections, to follow up with applications, calls, and emails after initial contact.

Asking and reaching out will not always lead to the desired result. But not asking at all is a certain way to not get the desired result at all. For example, at the beginning of the month, I emailed an alumna asking if she had time to speak to me about her experiences at a company I applied to. A week and a half passed with no response, so I sent a follow up email. After I had reconciled with the fact that people are busy and it is nothing personal, I received a response from the alumna. She was very helpful. Despite her busy schedule, she shared a few bits of advice that were incredibly helpful. In addition, she even encouraged me to look at openings with her current company, even though I was contacting her about another organization.

I entered the email with one objective, but the conversation developed into another possible employment opportunity. If I had never sent the email at all, it may have taken me longer to find those opportunities. I may not have found them at all! Keep in mind, I have had my fair shares of unanswered emails and rejections that were long winded fade away’s instead of a straight-up break-up. Through these experiences, I still asked for something and I still received, something.

I hope things are steadily getting checked-off your to-do list! After two separate thesis presentations for music and psychology, two group projects, and cultivating my psychology thesis document from zero to forty-four pages within the past week alone, the end of my semester is ending with a huge sigh of relief. I finally feel pressures dissolving, as I finally get to spend time celebrating success with my close friends and family.

Looking back on this semester, I faced the heaviest work load of my college career, just barely dipping my toes into post-graduate plans. I initially thought I would be bogged down by comparing myself to others. Through academic and personal challenges, I have began to fully realize what is important to me in the present and how to preserve that in the long term.

This semester has certainly stole the best of me at times, compromising basic physical and emotional health, but my support system has never been stronger or more salient. I never fully realized or appreciated the support I have from friends and family. With their help, I have found my strengths in my sound mind. I learned to set boundaries for myself. I learned that saying no to extra work or responsibilities is sometimes necessary, that asking for help and guidance is a sign of self-awareness and true growth, not weakness. I learned that perspective I take on my work and activities is far more important than the final output.

Sometimes, I had allowed confusion and self-doubt to seep in through pressured expectations of stress. I was not focusing what I could do, but what I had to do, what I was expected to do. I cycled thoughts of self-pity in my mind, limiting my own abilities and experiences by letting circumstance decide prevent me from trying in the first place. I began asking myself, “What type of person am I? What type of person do I want to be?” These questions have helped me stay on track and actively approach daily goals, from anything as small as maintaining day-to-day conversations with my significant other or making the time to journal by myself on Jaqua Quad.

This first, formidable semester of senior year has pushed me to new limits. It has been an incredibly busy time for producing works (thesis) and catapulting me into post-undergraduate thinking (I over heard someone a few weeks ago say, “Senior year, it’s over before it even begins.”) These transitional times always seem daunting from a far, like we might not rise up to the occasion, but that is all part of the process. More often than not, we look back, and are proud and thankful.

When chapters of our lives close, positives and negatives emerge; the dangerous longings of what-ifs, the idealist appeals without sustained action. However, at these turning points, it is important for us to recognize ourselves and how we have changed throughout a process.

Most importantly, when you read this, I hope I am somewhere celebrating the end of the semester like this…