Somebody else may be reading this right now. Somebody not from around here. Somebody special may be reading this little blog entry, reading every word I write.

Yes, dear reader. My potential employers may be reading this. Why? Because I included one of my blog entries in my application. Egads!

I’ve been spending every second since I hit the “send” button and shot my application off into cyberspace praying to every single deity anyone has ever worshiped EVER to get me this job. You see, I recently sent out an application to intern with a very large, very well-known online news site. Part of the application was to include a couple writing samples. I spent the majority of my application time poring through my outbox and my hard drive (which, if you remember, was decimated a while ago), trying to find something—ANYTHING—that may give me a leg up. What pieces, I asked myself, would best describe me and reflect my talents? Turns out that was a hard question to answer.

Since this internship was for a position that depended on being Internet savvy, I decided that a blog post (from this site) would be a good idea. It shows that I can at least type and upload something to the web, right? But it also shows that I have experience blogging and communicating through the Internet; that I’m a hip young cool cat with e-know-how and other things grownups don’t understand (some of them think that the web is a series of tubes). I just picked the blog post of mine that sounded the best and that I was most proud of.

But I wanted to show something else—some of my more serious, academic writing. Continue reading →

First: Yee! I got into my study abroad program and it’s official: Ich wird nach München fahren! Fassbinder! Lederhosen! Pretzels! Schnitzel! Bratwurst, currywurst, weißwurst, braunschweiger, Schweinsteiger!

And just like that I’m on the fast-track to a German major. Now, I’ve talked about major woes before, but it turns out just deciding what I wanted to do was the easy part. Now I’m faced with the weirdest scenario every time I tell someone about my intended focus of study. Let me show you.

EXT. CLAREMONT COLLEGES PARTY—NIGHT. JULIA, the young, beautiful heroine, is chatting with a random person.

JULIA: That’s really interesting. So, what’s your major?

OTHER PERSON: Oh, you know, econ. And gov. Gov and econ and politics and gov.

JULIA: That must be really interesting.

OP: Totally. Once I graduate, I’m going to get a job either at the White House or working for William F. Buckley. So what’s your major?

JULIA: Oh, I’m a German major, Poli-sci minor.

OP: Cool. (OP takes a swig of his/her drink. There is a long pause.) So what are you planning on doing with that?

Oh. Um. Well. It turns out that there are two kinds of majors: the ones the general public consider useful, and those they consider not-so-useful. Gov is useful. Economics is useful. Computer Science is really useful, especially since The Social Network got so many Oscar nominations. These majors are useful in the “real world”, people say. Translation: you can make big bucks off these majors.

Like the title of this blog entry says, people judge you based on your major. And if you have one that other people can’t immediately see being useful in the real world, girl, you gonna get judged hard. I was being silly in my little script above, but this type of thing happens with alarming regularity, even though it’s totally dumb.

Well, right here on this blog, I’m about to state my case for why having one of these “useless” languages is actually quite useful. Potential employers, fellow students, parents, everyone: listen up!

• While other people learn about one facet of a culture, whether that’s literature, politics, economics, or art, I’m responsible for all of that within the German-speaking world. And from Goethe to Merkel to Engels to Klimt, I’ve got a lot to cover. AND I have to cover it all in my second language (well, third, if you count my abominable Spanish.)
• I can write and speak in two languages in at a college level. Speaking German is important especially in economic fields: you just try to finagle the European financial crisis without speaking the language.
• Words that are three lines long don’t intimidate me, and neither do umlauts.

And on and on. But these sorts of characteristics aren’t just limited to us misunderstood German majors, but to all of the misunderstood majors. So buck up, you Classics majors! French studies ladies, holla if you hear me! Self-designed majors in Gender and Gastronomy of the Kamchatka Peninsula, go get ‘em! And then next time someone asks you, “so what are you planning to do with that?” just shrug and go about your way-more-interesting, way-more-fun business, you creative, clever cookies, you.

Bis später,

Julia

So this is a stretch, but does anybody remember the BBC miniseries Gormenghast? It was on… maybe ten years ago. No? Based on the novels by Mervyn Peake?  No? The name Titus Groan doesn’t ring a bell? Steerpike? Lord Sepulchrave? …No? Well, go on YouTube and look it up. It’s how I spent my entire Wedndesday evening: four hours of esteemed British actors and really bad CGI. Not like I had papers to write or anything.

But I don’t just bring this up to show off my geekiness, but to prove a point. See, Gormenghast is about this guy Steerpike (played by an incredibly young and oh-my-heavens-beautiful Jonathan Rhys Meyers) who starts off as this lowly kitchen boy and lies, cheats, steals and kills his way into power of the castle Gormenghast, playing the members of the ruling House of Groan off each other. Along the way there are roomfulls of Persian cats, a set of creepy twins, a murderous chef, and Stephen Fry. It’s awesome.

But back to Steerpike. Even though he’s pretty evil, you can’t help but root for him. The fact that he’s Jonathan Rhys Meyers helps up the sympathy a little (homeboy is gorgeous) but it’s really because of his passion that he’s such an interesting character. He wants to be ruler of Gormenghast, and you get the feeling like if he ever accomplished his goal, he’d be totally competent. But then, uh, you remember how he drove an old man to insanity and tried to kill a baby. Uncool. But (spoiler alert) he gets his comeuppance in the end and his face burns off and nobody loves him. Because that’s what this is all about, right? Having people love you and being pretty like Jonathan Rhys Meyers?

WRONG. I’m writing this blog entry for Career Planning & Resources, not Looking Like Jonathan Rhys Meyers Planning & Resources. And while going the Steerpike route and killing people for an internship may be a little too brutal, I think the real-life lesson from Gormenghast is that you can’t be afraid to get aggressive. It’s about toeing the line between chasing after what you want and getting crazy. There’s nothing wrong with ambition, as long as you know where to stop. I know I never want to step on any toes when I’m looking for an internship, but chasing after what you want is never a bad option.

I’ve had an email from a potential employer sitting in my inbox for a while. It’s not a job offer or anything like that, just a “here are my contacts if you want more information”, but I haven’t followed up yet. Actually, I’ve barely done anything in my search for a summer project aside from, well, blog about how I’m not doing anything yet. So maybe it’s time to take the Steerpike route and get a little more active. I’ll call that lady back and see what’s up. I’ll start looking a little more thoughtfully at my opportunities. I can overcome my odds, too! I don’t have to be a kitchen boy anymore! I can become ruler of Gormenghast—

–wait, no, I can’t. That’s not on The Gateway yet.

Bis später,

Julia

Upon waking Friday morning, I groggily checked my phone when got a double whammy of awesome: Mubarak stepped down in Egypt, and I got accepted to my study abroad program! Whee!

As a cup of coffee brewed in my new French press (thanks, Dad) and the dulcet sounds of Meet the Press’s David Gregory’s jubilant ululations over the Egyptian revolution, I had a little revelation: a whole year in Munich. I would be trading sun and surf for snow and schnitzel, CMC parties for discotheques, Kanye and Katy for David Hasselhoff. Oh my goodness.

…you probably think I’m leading up to a “What have I gotten myself into?” realization, right? Well, you’re wrong. I love the Hoff, and I’m PUMPED to leave—I mean, I’ll miss C-mont like all get out, but I believe that while change is good, radical change is where it’s really at. What I actually realized is that I am going to be poor.

Talking about money is tacky, and it’s hard to do without seeming like a creep, but it’s a pressing issue. I’d be lying if I said that I haven’t been praying for the Euro not to collapse in the next eight months. If it did, the German money (pretty much the only European country doing well in the recession) would have a crazy exchange rate with the weak dollar and I would be poor, poor, poor. The Euro’s bad enough.

My parents are awesome enough to be covering my travel to and from Munich, but I plan on doing a lot of little trips as well. Visiting friends in Stockholm, London, Paris, Italy, and Ireland will be expensive. Soccer games are going to be a necessary expense: I am not leaving without a picture with the Bayern team. Oktoberfest. Oh, and then I need to eat and clothe myself and get around the city.

Julia broke. Julia need paid internship. Julia need plain old work opportunity.

Might this screw up my resume? Might I be throwing away chances to work an unpaid internship with someone who may be a great connection later? Probably, but let’s be serious here: I gotta eat. Eating comes before resume-building. And, I’ll admit it to myself, so do soccer games (yes, yes, I’m a terrible person but I would actually sell my soul to see a Bayern Munich/Borussia Dortmund game at the Allianz Arena). So what should I do? What do you all think?

Dear _________,

My name is Julia. I am qualified for some stuff, and I am a nice girl. I want a job.

I don’t know what else to put in this cover letter, because I covered all of my experiences in my resume. So I guess I’ll just talk more about them here?

Well, I was a blogger for CP&R at Scripps. Since, in the description you posted on the Gateway about this position, you wanted someone who is detail-oriented and able to communicate, I guess that this job helped me in those things.

I also have another job on campus. It has also taught me to communicate well and made me pay attention to details. Gave me the quality of paying attention to details? It taught me to communicate well and also taught me to be detail oriented?

(…Maybe none of my work has taught me to communicate well, because this cover letter is not going so well right now.)

I am also a reliable, organized person. I am always on time, and if someone texts me I will promptly respond. I am also a good friend, and if my friends get sick, I will bring them tea or hold their hair back if they need to throw up. And I am organized because if more than one friend is sick, I can perform all these duties without neglecting the other. I think your organization can benefit from that kind of work ethic.

Thank you for this opportunity. I look forward to hearing back from you.

Julia

Why is writing a cover letter so hard? You have to talk about why you want the job, convince your potential future employees of why you’re good for the job, talk about how your past work makes you best for the job, and not sound like a total idiot. Oh, and you have to do all this in one page.  I am so, so bad at this. Even if people tell me what to write, giving me nice advice like “oh, instead of talking about this here, mention how you’ve done this” or “maybe this isn’t the right way to phrase it, maybe you should say this” I still end up sounding like a moron. Obviously my cover letter above is ludicrous and over-the-top, but my actual letters end up embarrassingly similar (minus the sickly friends, of course.)

I don’t have any answers to you in this column. I just want you to know that if you’re writing a cover letter and struggling, girl, mine is not cute either. And you know what? I’m sure nobody writes a good CL. They’re probably just so that the employer knows that you want the job enough to struggle through the hellish swamp that is writing one of these. I’m on to you, employers.

Bis später,

Julia