As it gets time to frantically apply to every possible internship and summer program, I want to take a moment and acknowledge everyone who – by choice, by necessity, by both – will be working in the service industry this summer. I worked as a hostess at a corporate, popular seafood restaurant the summer after my first year, and what I learned there will stick with me for life. Thanks to friends A and E, who augmented this with their excellent suggestions. Sadly, people in the real world aren’t always reasonable, thoughtful, or interested in hearing your side of the story. Pull up a chair, everyone, and let us impart our wisdom.

Multitasking. It was common, at my corporate seafood restaurant – hereafter shortened to CC – to have a manager stroll up, request that something be done immediately, and stroll away, completely ignoring the fact that I was busy doing something another manager had commanded mere moments ago. Too many cooks, all that broth, you know the story. The first time this happened, I tried to explain how I was in the midst of something Manager X had requested, and could they perhaps ask someone else? Manager Y looked at me blankly and I could sense they were forming a pretty negative opinion of me – What a shirker! Tries to worm out of anything I ask of her! The next time this happened, I was prepared. I thanked Manager Y, said I would deal with their request as soon as I finished what Manager X had asked of me, and rushed off busily. Both tasks were soon completed and Manager Y was pleased that she didn’t have to deal with a long-winded explanation. Moral of the story: don’t explain every side of the story. Acknowledge the request, note that you’ll get on it as soon as the job at hand is complete, and move on.

Common courtesy. It’s unfortunate that this even needs to be a topic, but such is life. Things I learned from working at CC: “Please” isn’t said half as often as it should be. People assume hosts and servers are uneducated and therefore have no other job prospects. People assume that the poorly-cooked dish is the fault of the busperson or the host. I promise, if you complain to the busperson, they will apologize, whisk the plate away, and laugh about you with everyone in the kitchen. If the problem is with the food, don’t take it out on the server. Let them know you’re unhappy without acting as if it’s their fault. I guess this bullet point is less about how to work in service and more about how to be a human being, but – again, such is life. This goes both ways – a customer may be behaving badly, but they may be having an awful day. Give them the benefit of the doubt, kill them with kindness (it’s funny how disarmed people can be when they expect something else and you smile sweetly instead), and remember that all this will come in handy when you write your memoirs.

It’s the little things. There were so many days I came to work peppy and cheerful, only to deal with unpleasant customers or angry managers and find my mood taking a turn for the worst. I went from being a cheerful hostess to one who treated interactions with customers as perfunctory and impersonal. One day I was feeling horrible and didn’t want to deal with anyone. A couple came in to celebrate an anniversary, and I realized that my bad mood and the rude actions of previous customers shouldn’t affect this couple’s happy evening. I did my best to make sure they had a great time, and the smallest things – a comp card for a free dessert, tipping their server off so he could offer them his best wishes, making sure they got a table with a nice view – made them very happy and cheered me up in the process. Think of it as being a benevolent secret elf. They may not realize that you’re the one making their experience better, but you know it! That good feeling will stick with you. The smallest things – a smile, or asking them how their dinner was and genuinely waiting to hear the answer – can mean so much. Likewise, if a family is having a heated discussion or a solo customer wants a quiet table for a meal and a book, it’s often better to remove yourself quickly and not force conversation.

In conclusion: It’s not the most glamorous job, and sometimes it’s hard to deal with customers who have no interest in you or your life and assume you were born to deal with their whining. But! I saved up for an amazing adventure abroad with the help of my summer job at CC, I got my foot in the door in the restaurant industry of my hometown, and I was able to secure a job at a bar in Germany because they liked that I had restaurant experience. Go forth and apply! (And for those who absolutely need an internship because the rest of their college career depends on it – I was able to balance this job with a part-time academic thing. It’s totally doable.)

Everyone should work in service, regardless of whether they need to make their own money or not. It makes you a human being, and on the bad days – remember, it’s all grist for the mill. Enjoy!