My Professional Idol

Picture this: you are seventeen years old, it is your junior year in high school, and you have just met with the college counselor for some advice on college applications.  What question did you rehearse answering?  I assume it had something to do with an idol; someone you look up to or would love to have a cup of coffee with.  As a sophomore in college, I am well prepared to answer the age-old interview question: who is your professional role-model?  However, just because every applicant is prepared to answer this question, just as every hiring manager is prepared to ask it, does not mean the answer has to be generic.

Hiring staff members are looking for someone who fits their needs, yes, but authenticity can be just as impressive as a perfectly tailored resume.  That is why I have not changed my answer, which is Helen Suzman, by the way, since my junior year in high school.  I know what half of your are thinking: that is the most generic answer there is.  I also know what the other half of you are thinking: who in the world is Helen Suzman?

Helen Suzman was a representative for the Progressive Party in the South African Parliament for 36 years, starting in 1953 (although she did not join the PP until 1959).  Yes, it is a little predictable that a female politics student looks up to a female politician, but let us dig a little deeper.

Suzman was the definition of a boss woman.  As the only progressive member of Parliament for 13 years in a row, Suzman avidly opposed and challenged her male colleagues, all of whom supported the apartheid.  She was taunted, excluded, and insulted by the rest of Parliament, but Suzman did not step down.  In fact, not only could she take it, but she could dish it.  When asked by a minister why she embarrassed South Africa with her questions, her response was that it was not her questions, but his answers, that were the embarrassment.

If there is anything that I respect, it is a strong woman with wit.  Some people would call a woman’s wit “attitude,” but I beg to differ.  A woman who throws a remark right back at the man who undermines and underestimates her is not a sassy woman.  Helen Suzman had a commitment to human rights, even when every single member of Parliament besides herself did not, and she would not be silenced.  A woman who uses her wit to silence the people who try to silence her is a pretty cool gal, in my book.  So yeah, I would get coffee with Helen Suzman.

My point is that as long as you know yourself, and know who you admire, it does not really matter how generic your answer to this question is.  There is nothing wrong with looking up to Beyonce, or Michelle Obama, or Abraham Lincoln.  Of course, setting up a mock interview with your career center and really working on how to answer this question is always helpful.  Anyone who knows me knows that my middle school teachers, and even the dean of students at my high school, would call me head-strong.  Some would say that is just another term for stubborn, but I never saw it that way.  I know what I want to do, know what I believe in, and am passionate about my goals as a young professional.  Therefore, my professional idol is a head-strong woman who proudly never backed down, and that is who I plan to become.

#CareerGoals

In past blog posts, I’ve talked about the importance of goals, dreams, and aspirations, of having somewhere to aim. I think it’s important to have a sense of direction. While I know I won’t achieve every one of my goals, and while most of my goals, over time, will change, they keep me moving, discovering, and experiencing new things.

One way in which I’ve set goals my whole life is by having role models, a different one for every stage of my life (I’ll call them “career crushes”). While my role models have ranged from family friends to the famous, from athletes to scientists, there’s a common thread between each of them. I tend to admire my role models not just for their line of work, but for the grace with which I see them weave together their career, life, and passions. Each of my role models has embodied some kind of value to which I aspire.

Career Crush #1. I’m seven years old, and I’m obsessed with JK Rowling. I’ve been reading her books for two years already and I know that I want to do what she does. That is, create entire worlds. When I read Harry Potter, I feel transported somewhere else. As a kid with an imagination so vivid that it spills over into my perception of the real world, I want to be able to pull other people into a world of my creation. While I’m beginning to understand that magic like Harry uses isn’t actually real, JK Rowling’s ability to use words to create a new animal or spell so vivid that I can see it in my head seems like another kind of magic, one that I want to master.

Little me... erm... Hermione

Little me… erm… Hermione

Career Crush #2. I’m fifteen, and all I want to be is my assistant Cross Country Coach, Jenn Shelton. Accompanying us on runs, she tells us all about how she studied poetry at a prestigious university, got tired of that, then left to live life moment to moment and pursue adventure.

As a strung-out, type-A high school student desperate for a 4.0, I was fascinated by the idea that you could just leave something making you unhappy. It seemed dangerous, but so enticing. Jenn tells us about how after tiring of competing as a surfer, she got back into running and like with everything she pursued in life, went for it with gusto and a great sense of humor. We hear her stories of ordering Pizza Hut in the middle of a 100-mile race, hallucinating with fatigue and losing the trail in her attempt to break the world record for running the 273-mile John Muir trail, and the infamous story of the ultra-marathon she and her friends completed the day after eating an entire pan of jalapeno mac-and-cheese. She’s kind to me and everyone on the team, always tries to downplay her accomplishments, and promises that she’ll only run as long as she enjoys it. It’s not so much that I want to be a professional runner (although I would happily take that). I just want Jenn’s attitude towards life.

Career Crush #3. I’m seventeen, and I’m all about setting achievable goals. I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m not about to leave school to become a professional anything, and my new career crushes are family friends Tim and Leslie. They are doctors at the rural health clinic “La Clinica,” and I’m currently shadowing Tim. He’s only allowed 15 minutes per patient, but he’s animated and friendly as he rushes between an old woman, who he clearly knows well, joking around with her in spanish, and a little girl with asthma, who he instructs to “breathe like she’s blowing out all the candles on a cake” during her breath test. Leslie’s there as well. At the end of Thursday they go home together for the weekend. Leslie and Tim share a job, but they’ve worked it out so that they complete their hours at the same time. On the weekends, Leslie goes on long runs and Tim goes snowboarding. Their life epitomizes a balance between hard, meaningful work and family and relaxation that inspires me with excitement for the “real world”.

Career Crush #4. I’m a sophomore at Scripps and until recently, I’ve felt a little lost. I’ve given up on becoming a doctor, because I realized that the vast majority of students and doctors I meet do not have Leslie and Tim’s work life balance. But recently, I’ve found a new career crush: Barbara Kingsolver, a writer, bringing me full circle to my days of idolizing JK Rowling (and let’s be honest, I never stopped idolizing her). Barbara Kingsolver touched something in me with her poetic words describing science and nature. I’d never realized that you could use words in a way that could transform science into something so beautiful. Plus, I knew that Kingsolver had a PhD in biology, and moved between Arizona and an organic farm her family runs in West Virginia. Her life for me had elements of both contradiction and the balance I sought. Suddenly, I’m awoken from my indecision, inspired to find a middle ground between my love for science and my lifelong love for words and imaginary worlds.


In the future, I don’t know where I’ll end up. I could still be a writer, a doctor, or a PhD (I’m just going to venture and say I’m not likely to become a professional ultra-runner). I guess I could even be all three, although that would involve a lot of school. But there’s value in reflecting on who I’ve looked up to, and the values I saw lived out in their careers. The people I’ve looked up to are creative, and a little crazy (in the case of Jenn, at least). They have ventured off the beaten path, and taken some risks. They work for themselves, but their careers do something that I see as valuable for the world, whether that’s by weaving stories, coaching teenagers, or healing people.

Family Weekend Musings and Advice from my Role Models

A few weekends ago, my mom and her friend from college came to visit for Family Weekend. We had the most amazing time, filled with hiking, delicious food, deep, meaningful conversations, SNL, and lots of silly mom jokes. While the weekend was certainly comprised of mostly fun and games, we also spent some time talking about my future plans pertaining to careers, majors, and study-abroad programs.

These topics mostly came up on our last full day together, when my mom Jane, her friend Lauren and I stopped at one of my favorite spots in town—Last Drop Cafe—in the Village, to pick up some caffeinated drinks and sandwiches to have a little picnic on the Pomona lawn. I had introduced myself to the owner, who was making our drinks, because I had remembered him from a presentation he gave to the Motley Coffeehouse employees (his cafe supplies a lot of our baked goods). He was really friendly and talked to the three of us for a few minutes. After we got our food and were on our way to campus, I mentioned how amazing it was that he seemed to love his job and get genuine joy out of making people happy, one latte and cookie at a time. This conversation soon morphed into musings related to careers in general, and Lauren and my mom were both curious and eager to discuss my future plans.

Since Lauren seemed to have a lot of experience surrounding careers and life in general, I asked for her opinion on what she pictured me doing down the road. I know what I don’t want to do, but when I try to solidify what it is I do want to do, things get a bit muddier.

The previous night, Lauren had shared the entire story of how she ended up becoming a physician’s assistant, along with all of the bumps and divots that got her there. It wasn’t her initial plan at all, but it ended up being a dream that she decided to pursue. She also elaborated on her two kids’ decisions pertaining to majors and jobs. It was really reassuring to hear that people arrive at their careers and goals through all sorts of different paths, that most trajectories are not entirely linear, and that not all people go into college having a “plan.”

Lauren, being the insightful and kind soul that she is, ended up telling me what kind of careers she pictured me doing and why. She provided some really interesting points and justifications that would have never occurred to me. Ultimately, we all have to make our own decisions regarding career choices, but I found it really useful and comforting to obtain advice from a wise and experienced outside source who could assess my strengths and weaknesses more objectively than a family member could. While my mom arguably knows me better than anyone else (even better than myself sometimes,) she can be biased in the sense that she knows I get anxious about my future easily, so her advice is always in the realm of telling me to “worry less,” or “not think about it.” She constantly reassures me that it will “all work out.” While this sort of advice works well for me, I also need the kind of advice provided by Lauren, which can help push me along and ensure that I am taking steps towards whatever goals I have.

Moreover, one of the most important things I gained from my conversion with Lauren was how I need to find a balance between practicality and passion. She stressed the importance of planning ahead, and making sure the decisions I make regarding my major, internships, study-abroad, etc. are rooted in some form of logic and practicality. In other words, she wants to make sure that I have thoroughly considered all of my options and how it will all fit together to get me in a place I want to be.

Overall, I am so lucky that I have strong role-models that have helped guide me in all facets of my life. I hope to continue to learn from others who are older, more experienced, and more insightful than I am. It’s reassuring to realize that I don’t need to figure it all out on my own, and I can always ask for help and guidance. For anyone else out there who feels confused and indecisive, I recommend finding some positive older role-models who can be a source of guidance and support.

T-shirts always convey the truest statements. Source: http://www.inourhands.com/skills-building/positive-role-model/

T-shirts always contain the truest statements.
Source: http://www.inourhands.com/skills-building/positive-role-model/

 

Finding My Career Role Model

My mom is the queen of introductions. She loves to meet new people and then introduce them to others whom she believes they will get along with. She also happens to loves making me talk to everyone and anyone that she can find to “give her young daughter advice on finding a job”. Due to my mother’s meddling in my career path, I was lucky enough to meet one of my first career role models and one of my close friends.

When I was a senior in high school and navigating the stressful path of college applications, my mother met a young woman at a party and immediately got her number. She came home and forced me to call the woman and invite her to coffee so that “I could learn a little something from a successful, smart lady”. At that point, I dreaded reaching out to people for advice and I assumed that no one in their right mind would want to talk to a teenager about career paths for an hour. Surprisingly, when I called the lady she sounded happy to talk to me and immediately set up a day and time that we could meet.

We ended up meeting for an hour at the Philz Coffee near my house and I cannot stress the importance of that one hour on some of the decisions that I have made in my career path. I could not believe that someone so successful had gone through some of the same choices and struggles that I was currently undergoing. On top of that, she had gotten through it and had advice for me to do the same. She talked to me openly about changing her college major, deciding whether to work for non-profits or the corporate world, and completely changing her dream job. She also gave me advice on how to get internships and what to look for in prospective colleges, which were important issues on my mind at the moment. Overall, she managed to make me feel like I was not alone in the struggle of determining my career path and her own winding path gave me some peace of mind.

After that one hour, I immediately called my mom and thanked her for forcing me to meet this woman even though I had repeatedly complained about it. I also remained in touch with her over the years and she continues to check in with me and give me advice on whatever I am dealing with at the moment.

In the past, I had never thought that people would be so open about their different paths, but I have realized that everyone loves to talk about himself or herself and it is up to us to pursue this type of mentoring relationship. Over the years, I have forced myself to become more open to mentors and role models in different aspects of my life. All of these people have impacted my life in various ways and have helped me make countless decisions, but most of all they have made me feel like I am not alone in my struggles.